Lawnmower
by Rabidnar
Summary: Cameron has a new lawn-chair and Remy isn't too fond of it.


Written for: Less than 13  
Prompt: Lawnmower!

Disclaimer: I don't own House or any of the characters!

Yes...I realize how ooc and silly this is, but hey...I had fun. xD

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"Babe, you missed a spot by the fence," Cameron called over the roar of the lawnmower motor. She waved her hand in the general direction of the uncut grass before lifting her glass of lemonade out of the cup holder on the lawn chair. She was about to take a drink but lowered the glass when Remy turned the lawnmower. "Don't cut back over it or you're going to make it uneven!"

The brunette scowled and brushed a few strands of hair that had managed to escape her scrunchy away from her face. She pulled the cord to the lawnmower and turned it off then braced herself against the handle as she turned to face Cameron. "We're not going to catch the grass on fire!" she exclaimed, making an exaggerated hand motion down toward the ground.

Cameron sipped from the lemonade then replaced it in the cup holder and adjusted her oversized sunglasses. "I'm worried enough about you and Kutner catching yourselves on fire," she replied, leaning back against the chair. She peered through the spaces between porch banister so she could still keep an eye on her girlfriend. "If you're going to set off fireworks tonight, at least spare my lawn."

"It's like three or four hundred degrees out," Remy whined, turning to stare at the lawnmower again. She sighed and gripped the bottom of her sweat-soaked t-shirt then pulled it up over her head. The white fence that surrounded their yard prevented the neighbors from seeing her in nothing but a gray sports bra and blue, short shorts with the number '13' on the side. "I'm going to get sunburned!"

With an exasperated sigh, Cameron tilted her head down to look over the top of her sunglasses. "Yes, you are," she agreed. "Come up here and put some sunscreen on if you're going to run around half naked outside." She frowned as she watched the younger woman try to drape her shirt over the back of the lawnmower. "And bring that up here so it doesn't fall and get grass all over it."

Remy opened her mouth to speak then shut it again and grinded her teeth together. She twisted the shirt tightly around her hand as she dragged herself across the lawn and up the stairs onto the porch. "Our yard is too big," she complained, dropping the article of clothing onto the wood porch. She sat down on the chair by Cameron's feet and slouched forward. "I can't even get by the pool unless I get out the weed-whacker."

"I'm beginning to think that number on your shorts matches your age better than your name," Cameron replied with a smirk. She sat up and pulled up the bottom of her white sundress so it came to her knees then spread her legs apart. "Sit up here before I'm rubbing aloe on you instead of sunscreen."

"Bossy, aren't we?" Remy asked, returning the smirk. She scooted back on the chair so she was sitting between Cameron's legs.

"Someone has to keep you in line," Cameron answered. She leaned forward and kissed Remy's shoulder before reaching down beside the chair and grabbing the bottle of sunscreen. She flipped open the lid and squeezed some of it onto her hand before rubbing both hands together. "Just try to keep the sparks contained to the places you mowed, okay?"

"Hmph," Remy grunted, hugging her legs closer to her body. She crossed her arms over her knees and buried her face against them, sighing quietly as Cameron began rubbing the sunscreen on her back. "You don't trust the two of us together," she grumbled.

"Because the two of you cause chaos together," Cameron replied, making sure she hadn't missed any spots before gently massaging her girlfriend's shoulders. "It took me five hours to unflood the kitchen after your last incident."

"That was different," Remy answered, shaking her head. She shrugged Cameron's hands away from her shoulders and leaned back against her, lowering her legs again. "That's because Taub was here." She slouched down slightly so she could rest her head back against Cameron's shoulder. "Kutner and I don't ruin things unless Taub is with us too."

Cameron put more sunscreen on her hands then worked on rubbing it on Remy's chest and stomach. "After last week, I think Cuddy and the EEG would disagree with you." She wrapped her arms loosely around the younger woman, letting her cheek rest against the side of her head. "The patient who was getting the EEG would probably disagree also."

Remy grimaced. "I guess you have a point," she begrudgingly admitted. She turned so she was sitting sideways, letting her head continue to rest against Cameron's bare shoulder. The heat was beginning to get the best of her and she longed to be inside with the air conditioner, but she wanted to be with Cameron - who seemed perfectly content relaxed on her new, bright green chair. Her eyes flickered toward the glass of lemonade but she just sighed and closed her eyes.

"You're pouting," Cameron pointed out. She leaned her head back against the chair and closed her eyes, gently patting Remy's thigh for a moment. "That means you _are_ too hot or you're trying to get my attention, both of which will lead to you taking the rest of your clothes off and trying to make me get off this chair."

"Can it be both?" Remy asked, opening her eyes again. "It is too hot and you look even more gorgeous than usual today." She turned and pushed herself up slightly, resting her elbow on Cameron's shoulder. She traced her fingers along the top of Cameron's dress. "You've been sitting out here all day."

"I'm pretty sure that's what I bought the chair for," Cameron mumbled, stifling a yawn. She felt around on the arm of the chair until she found her glass again. After taking a small swallow, she held it out toward Remy. "If you're really that hot, go jump in the pool before you have a heat-stroke."

"I hate this chair." Remy took a few drinks before holding the cold glass against her cheek and then her forehead. "Come swimming with me?" She put the glass down again then stood and tugged her shorts off.

Cameron pulled her glasses off and put them on the ground then cracked her eyes open. "I was at the hospital all night. I just want to sit here." She rolled onto her side and curled her legs up slightly. "You're a big girl; I'm sure you can find some way to amuse yourself swimming alone."

Turning to face the pool, Remy glanced at Cameron out of the corner of her eye. She looked at the water again and bit down on her lip and rocked back on her heels. In one swift movement, she spun around and scooped the older woman up into her arms.

Eyes flying open, Cameron let out a small shriek. "Remy Hadley, what are you doing?!" she cried, giving her an annoyed look. "Put me down _now_." She squirmed to get away, trying to grab at the arm of her chair but only managing to catch air.

"Stop squirming before I drop you," Remy warned her, adjusting her in her arms. "You're a bit heavier than you look."

Cameron stopped moving and narrowed her eyes. She slapped Remy's shoulder then threw her arms around her neck. "Please, put me down," she begged as Remy began carrying her down the porch steps. "I'll do whatever you want, just…" Her eyes went even wider as she noticed they were nearing the pool. "No!" she screamed, tightening her grip.

Remy grinned, despite that Cameron was practically choking her and clawing at her back. "This reminds me of when I was five and tried to give my cat a bath." She stopped in front of the pool, trying to figure out how she was going to launch Cameron over the wall of it.

"Remy, I'm wearing white! You'll be able to see through it!" Cameron panicked, craning her neck to glance at the water. She whimpered and quickly hid her face against the younger woman's neck.

"You act like I've never seen your breasts before," Remy remarked with a smirk, tapping one of her feet on the ground. She tried to push Cameron over the edge, but the older woman somehow ended up lying on her stomach on top of the wall, clinging to the pool for dear life.

"I'm going to cry," Cameron warned her, squeezing her eyes shut. She had one arm and leg on the outside of the pool and the other arm and leg on the inside, just beneath the water. It was freezing. "I'm going to cry and then you're going to feel really bad." She forced her chin to start quivering.

"You're not going to cry," Remy replied, rolling her eyes. She stared at her for a moment before trying to pry her arm away from the side of the pool.

Cameron tightened her grip, furiously shaking her head. "Stop it," she begged, trying to roll herself over the edge and get back on the ground.

"Fine," Remy grumbled, taking a step back and putting her hands in the air. She walked away from her, letting Cameron sulk back to her chair. Needing to cool down, she climbed the ladder then slowly lowered herself down into the water. Pursing her lips together, she skimmed the top of the water with her hands until she grabbed the small, purple water gun. Turning to the wall of the pool, she knelt down so only the top of her head and her eyes would be visible to Cameron.

Cameron stood at the top of the steps for a moment and fixed her dress. She shot Remy a warning look then curled up on her chair again, clinging tightly to the arm of it as she closed her eyes.

Grinning, Remy glanced down at the water gun. She lifted it and pointed at Cameron then pushed the trigger. "Fuck," she grumbled when the stream of water didn't even reach the porch. She climbed the ladder again and lowered herself to the ground then walked back to the porch, clutching the water gun tightly.

"Don't even think about it," Cameron mumbled as Remy blocked the sun from hitting her. "Whatever you're doing, don't."

Remy shot her in the foot.

Groaning, Cameron opened her eyes again, realizing Remy wasn't going to let up. It really wasn't like she could blame her though. Because of work, they hadn't seen each other in nearly seventy-two hours. "Give me that," she demanded, holding her hand out.

"You're going to throw it, aren't you?" Remy asked. She tilted her head to the side and held the water gun against her chest.

"I'm not going to throw your stupid toy," Cameron replied. She rubbed at her eyes then sat up and held her hand out again. "Give it to me."

Remy watched her for a moment before her smile faded. "_Sorry_ if I miss you," she muttered, tossing the squirt gun onto the chair beside Cameron's legs. "I'm going in." She motioned toward the door and turned her back to Cameron.

Cameron leaned forward and fumbled for the gun then turned to face Remy. "Don't move or I'll shoot," she warned, putting her finger on the trigger. "Turn around."

Remy shook her head. Fortunately, her back was to Cameron, because it was impossible to wipe the smirk from her face. She knew exactly how to play the other woman and get what she wanted. Her shoulders slumped forward and she wiped at her eyes.

Cameron dropped her hands down to her side and got to her feet. "Remy, I'm sorry," she apologized, her voice much softer. "I'm just really tired." She approached the woman from behind and wrapped her arms around her, trying to ignore that she was now wet and cold.

Remy glanced down and grabbed the squirt gun from Cameron then quickly spun around, her grin widening. "You're such a sucker," she laughed, shooting the older woman in the forehead.

Clamping her eyes shut and scrunching up her face as she was hit with water, Cameron let out a sigh. "I'm hurt by that," she muttered, opening her eyes just enough so she could see.

"Literally?" Remy asked, raised her eyebrows.

Cameron paused for a moment. "Yes." She backed up and sat down on her chair then lowered herself down on her back. "I think some mouth to mouth is in order, Doctor."

"Yes, Ma'am." Remy grinned and tossed the squirt gun to the side before lowering herself onto her hands and knees, hovering above Cameron. She leaned forward, eagerly pressing their lips together. "Come swimming with me?" she pleaded, her lips brushing Cameron's as she spoke.

"Do me on the chair and then we'll talk about the pool," Cameron murmured, working on getting Remy out of her wet clothes.

"I knew I liked this chair."


End file.
